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Get yourself checked out. Try not to focus on what you may have done wrong. While it may not feel like it right now, and while your partner may even try to blame his or her bad behavior on you, try to remember this is not your fault.

How to Move Forward when someone cheats

This was their choice. It is a common, albeit, shameful reaction, to blame the other person for the choices they have consciously made, but do not allow them to lay that at your feet. But that is not the case, this is a complete demonstration of who their partner is.

It might not be obvious at first, but you will have to own up to your role. Did you withhold sex? It has been updated to reflect which portions are her words. Suddenly stopping this kind of behavior could potentially mean that they have found sex or emotional intimacy outside the relationship. Alternatively though, it could be totally innocent.

It's absolutely normal for there to be lulls in your sex life with your partner, especially if both of you are busy and tired.

23 people share the awful way they discovered their partner was cheating.

Taking a new medication or dealing with a lot of stress could also contribute to less desire to have sex, so do not immediately jump to conclusions. Instead, talk to your partner about what's up. When beginning a new relationship, people will find out what their new love interest is passionate about and learn all about it, she says. Madden says, so if your partner has taken up a new hobby or become obsessed with a new TV show, this might be one subtle sign that they've met someone new.


If your partner accuses you of being unfaithful, you might get worried that something innocent and small like getting close to a new work friend might look like cheating to them, and so you don't have time to look at what your partner is doing. Catching your partner in a white lie might seem like nothing to worry about. But being untruthful about something really insignificant can turn out to be a sign of cheating , Adele Alligood, a relationship expert and couples therapist for EndThrive , tells Bustle.

For example, maybe you ask where your partner has been and they say they were at work, but you later you find out that they stopped by a friends house instead. Watching how your partner acts in a new social setting can offer up some major clues as to whether they're being faithful.

19 Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Cheating On Them

For example, when meeting new people, does your partner introduce their friend as their friend, their cousin as their cousin, and you with just your name — not as their partner? All that being said, just because your partner's friend cheated doesn't guarantee that they will, especially if your partner is the one encouraging their buddy to stop that kind of behavior. Some people just seem to be perpetually late, no matter how much time they give themselves to get ready. But if your usually punctual partner has been forgetful, inattentive, and constantly running late recently, this could be a sign that they're being unfaithful.

But signs of cheating, whether the affair is purely physical or emotional , are often subtle. They strive to make everything appear normal. So if you tend to be a trusting person, it can be easy to overlook the less-obvious signs of cheating.

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Keep an out for these warning signs. Take note of these signs you're in a loveless marriage. Again, a change is the big factor.

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  • But sometimes they try to have sex more at home. But some may do so to satisfy a partner so that the partner will not be seeking sex at a later time when the cheater knows he or she won't be available. Cheaters tend to be less careful about covering their tracks in front of friends versus you.

    And, of course, people tend to confide in their friends.

    Your partner wants more space and time to themselves.

    This can include a range of things, like changing their password or keeping their phone on them all the time when they used to leave it sitting out. Doares agrees. Cheaters have to make time for their fling—and that time usually comes from time you once spent together. Find out what helps married couples stay together forever. People usually share intimate details of their day with their partner. As a result, they end up telling you less.

    Here are some ways to re-build trust in a relationship. This is a weird but common habit of cheaters—and there are a few reasons for it, Coleman says. By making your alleged behavior the issue, it puts you on the defensive and takes the focus off of them.